whoosh

sourcedumal:

poemsofthedead:

I read it, and I agree with it all in theory because I know that it comes from a place of love and that what it is saying is good advice we should all try to live by.

But this is a letter from a Black woman to a Black woman about an intra-Black issue (i.e. how some Black women talk about other Black women, how some Black women build a career by intentionally taking down or hurting other Black women). I don’t know Wendy Williams - never watched her show, had to Google her name after reading the letter. I do know of Janet Hubert and have a lot of respect for her. Hubert has every reason and right to say what she said to Williams.

But that’s between Black women. It’s for Black women to cheer or critique, or both. It’s for Black women to discuss amongst themselves. It’s for Black women to decide how to move forward with that advice. It’s for Black women to decide if they want to add to the chorus. It is for Black women to judge.

I’m not comfortable seeing non-Black people posting it. I’m extremely uncomfortable seeing white people posting it.

Even if you add no commentary, don’t say a word about what it meant to you to read the letter, when you reblog it you are sharing something personal (yes, I know it was made public, but that doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t think about our relationship to it and consider whether it is our business) and entering into a conversation that isn’t yours to enter into. And frankly, I just don’t trust the real, deeper, intentions when we feel compelled (especially not when white people feel so compelled) to share these things. I don’t trust that they don’t really stem from anti-Blackness, and anti-Black misogyny specifically, and a satisfaction at seeing Black women “fight”.

I’m not suggesting that non-Black people shouldn’t even read the letter. I’m also not suggesting that you can’t have thoughts about it, but only that the rest of the world - and especially Black women - really don’t need to hear our thoughts or opinions on this matter. I think Hubert’s advice is what we all can and should try to live by and applies across race. I’m not saying we can’t read it and think about how it applies to us, if we have a burden to bear for how we contribute to or consume celebrity gossip - and if we have allowed those habits to seep into our real lives with our friends, families, co-workers. Because it isn’t only celebrities that can be harmed by gossip. And I’m not even going to say “how dare you!” enjoy some celebrity gossip because I don’t feel it’s my place to judge that. I only ask that we each quietly question ourselves and reflect a little more.

But I am saying - this is a conversation by and between and for Black women and I think the rest of us need to stay the hell out of it. There is no reason for any of us to feel smug about Williams and glory in her being taken down a notch - afterall, she is still a Black woman trying to make her way in a world that limits how Black women can “make it”, and we all (those of us who aren’t Black women) have degrees of systemic power & privilege over her. Nor is there any reason for us to become defensive and shrug off Hubert’s concerns - afterall, she is still a Black woman trying to have a difficult and intimate conversation with fellow Black women in a world that polices how Black women are allowed to express themselves and which expression styles are worthy of being heard, and we all (those of us who aren’t Black women) have degrees of systemic power & privilege over her.

I’m just suggesting that we really think before we hit the reblog button: what is the value/purpose of ME reblogging this, and what am I contributing to the conversation, and is it my place to be contributing anything to this conversation at all?

White people, this is how you handle thing happening between poc: YOU STAY THE FUCK OUT OF THE CONVERSATION.